71 Thoughts You Have When You Fly

By Meghan Brennan

Around here, we’re kind of experts on the whole “travel” thing – by air, land, or sea – but there are a few things that pop into our heads no matter how many times we make the trek to the airport – and we bet a lot of them will sound pretty familiar.shutterstock_159069122

– I hate parking at the airport.

– Why didn’t I get someone to give me a ride?

– Oh, because I’m taking a flight at the crack of dawn.

– Spot, consider yourself grabbed. Victory.

– I might’ve packed too much.

– Did I really need that third pair of shoes?

– Yes. Yes I did.

– Whoa. That check-in line is long.

– Good thing I checked in online. Score.

– And I don’t have to check luggage.

– Damn, I’m good at this.

– OK, there’s no way that’s the security line.

– It’s…monstrous.

– OK, no problem, I can handle this.

– Maybe I should get Pre-Check. Do I fly enough for that?

– La la la la…lines are fine. I’ve got time, right?

– Still an hour before boarding. So yeah.

– Shoes off, jacket off.

– Liquid baggie out.

– Don’t beep don’t beep don’t beep.

– Didn’t beep. #WINNING

– Mmm…I should get a sandwich for the plane.

– Eleven dollars for a sandwich?

– Fine. Darn it.

– Oh, there’s my gate.

– Wait, we’re boarding already?

– When did that happen?

– Oh, they didn’t call my section yet.

– I guess I’ll just mill around here aimlessly for a bit.

– La la la…shake it off, shake it off, oh oh.

– Hey, my group! I’m outta here.

– Why are all of the overhead bins taken?

– No, seriously. Who puts two bags and their coat up there?

– Please don’t make me check this bag.

– Oh, thank you, lovely flight attendant, for finding a spot for my bag.

– OK, aisle seat, just you and me for the next two hours.

– Safety briefing time!

– Tube may not inflate.

– Hey, someone did my crossword puzzle and left the magazine! Rude.

– Floor lights will change color.

– Closest exit may be behind you – there it is!

– Ooh, here we go!

– Wheeeeee!

– We’re flying!

– Really, guys, we’re in the sky.

– How is everyone around me not excited?

– Ugh, fine. Don’t think it’s awesome.

– Alright, book, let’s do this.

– Oh, hello drink cart.

– Why is ginger ale so much better on a plane?

– Dunno, just is.

– Did he just say turbulence?


– Crisis averted.

– Well done, me.

– Oh good, a crying baby.

– I’m sorry for your pain, crying baby.

– But I’m also sorry for mine.

– How that man is sleeping through the combined noise of the plane, the crying baby, and his own snoring is astonishing.

– Aww, crying baby is actually kind of cute when it stops crying.

– Oh right, I have a sandwich!

– Sandwich, you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

– Except for that nasty congealed mayo-type stuff.

– That’s pretty gross.

– Back to book.

– Final descent?

– Sweet.

– Don’t you glare at me for looking out the window.

– Your window seat does not give you exclusive rights to the view.

– Touchdown!

– So, when can we do that again?


About Meghan Brennan

Meghan_BrennanIn between jet setting around the world to research blog posts, Meghan enjoys eating caviar and attending polo matches with the Queen. She also has a highly overactive imagination. When persuaded to interact with reality, she spends a lot of time in used book stores and planning her next adventure.